Joyful Living


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So what do I mean by resilience?

It is that central quality to absorb pressure without being defeated by the pressure. Drawing on my personal experience of over 25 years on Boards including 10 years being Chairman of a UK National Health Primary Care Trust; I have found that resilience had been a significant key factor in enabling me to get through difficult and challenging situations.

Resilience is your ability to make positive adaptations to negative events in your life and resilience have some similarity to optimism. According to the Random House Dictionary [1]resilience means to spring back or rebound. Resilience in psychology refers to the idea of an individual’s tendency to cope with stress and adversity[2].

In other words, resilience is the ability to persist in the face of challenges and to bounce back from adversity. There are a number of evidence-based factors that contribute to resilience: optimism, effective problem solving, faith, sense of meaning, self-efficacy, flexibility, impulse control, empathy, close relationships, and spirituality, among others (Masten & Reed, 2002).

These behaviours are however, not simply an inborn trait found in a portion of the people. Psychologists have been studying resilience since the 1970s, and research has demonstrated that there are many aspects of resilience that are teachable (Reivich & Shatte, 2002; Seligman, 1990). Resilience can be developed, Martin Seligman very successful programme of study that taught resilience skills to non-commissioned officers in the US military has been well reported covered in a Harvard Business Review article in the April 2011.

By nature as human beings you tend to be very resilient but you may need to be coached in understanding that you have this capability and that growth can also result from adversity and difficulty.

Give some thought to the following questions:

  • Have you ever wondered why is it some people appear to remain calm under pressure and often triumph in the face of disaster and adversity?
  • Conversely, have you met other people who given the similar circumstances seem to fall apart?

There is a type of resilience that is about reacting to stressful situation, a typical form of this type of resilience is the strength that is needed to cope with being made redundant, working through self-development following poor performance review, finding that your shares have been wiped out by the stock market, coping with bereavement or going through a divorce.

In such circumstances it is the toughness and humility that you need to gather in order to respond constructively to these difficult situations. The mental toughness that is needed is the ability to see beyond the prevailing current difficulties and to know that the future has endless possibilities.

The will be times in your leadership when you are required to lead the delivery of a change that will be uncomfortable to some people and there will be leadership challenges. In leading the change, how do you deal with stressful leadership challenges?

This is where appropriate coaching and strategic support is invaluable. The fundamental role of the coach in this situation is to enable you to be even more self-aware. Knowing your values, understanding the environment in which you are in, the push and pull factors and specific challenges, your patterns of behaviour and what you think and feel about specific situations, the alignment of your values with your decisions, knowing the impact of your actions and treatment of others, knowing your signature strengths and the areas on which you need to build, knowing your boundaries – where do you have full influence? Partial influence and no influence at all? Taking care of yourself, knowing when to rest, relax and celebrate your progress is vitally important.

Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is wisdom, mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.

Tao Te Ching

When you are being coached within a Thinking Environment® you will find the strength to access your own internal wisdom and knowing that you will find the strength to journey through your challenges. You will find the power to respond and evaluate each step of the way without fear of failure.

Your confidence in the face of hardship is underpinned by your ability to let go of negativity that may hold you back. Martin Seligman at the University of Pennsylvania has researched this phenomenon extensively and he argues that success in life is driven by a crucial distinction: whether you believe that your failures are produced by personal deficits beyond your control or are they mistakes you can fix with effort.

The greatest glory of living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time you fall.

Nelson Madela

When you are able to remain calm you develop what psychologists call resilience, or an ability to cope with problems and setbacks. When you develop resilient qualities you are able to utilize your skills and strengths to cope and recover from problems and challenges, which may include the loss of a job, financial problems, illness, natural disasters, medical emergencies, structural reorganisation at work and discontinuity within your team.

When you have low resilience you may become overwhelmed by such experiences. You may find that you have a tendency to dwell on problems and use unhealthy coping mechanisms to deal with such challenges. Generally, with low resilience you are slower to recover from setbacks and may experience more psychological distress as a result.

When you have moderate to high levels of resilience you will use coping skills and you will demonstrate abilities to problem-solve and deal with the issues in varying degrees depending on your levels of resilience. You will demonstrate mental toughness and challenge the situations and issues to bring about resolutions and acceptable outcomes.

You will be comfortable in knowing that while resilience neither eliminates stress nor erases life’s difficulties; resilience gives you the strength to tackle problems head on, overcome adversity and move on with your life.

 Resilience and self-reliance are strategic coping skills. They are major components of emotional intelligence and they can be learnt.

Dr Neslyn Watson-Druée, CBE FCGI FRCN support and coach clients to develop emotional intelligence inclusive of self-reliance and resilience; when you work with Neslyn you will be guided with practical ways to apply resilience at work.

To book a coaching strategy strategy with Dr Neslyn Watson-Druée email:

[1] Random House Dictionary

[2] Masten, A. S. (2009). “Ordinary Magic: Lessons from research on resilience in human development” (PDF). Education Canada 49 (3): 28–32.

Being Authentic and Confident

Authentic Choice- Be You - Front Cover

Signed Copy of Dr Neslyn’s Book will be available at Authentic and Confident Workshop


Only the truth of who you are, if realised, will set you free

  • Eckhart Tolle – A New Earth

Being Authentic and Confident – Workshop 30 November 2016

  • Venue: Crown Plaza – Battersea, London
    Time 0900 – 1700 hours
  • Did you know that being authentic is one of the most challenging yet one of the most important aspect of your growth as a human being?
  • Did you know that authenticity elevates your business above the competition?

Is your life False – Are you living your version of yourself?

  • How honest and truthful are you with yourself and others?
  • Are you confident – How in touch are you with yourself?
  • Do you have the courage to be yourself?
  • Are you being held back from your dreams and passions?
  • Are you living a life based on the expectations of others?

Most of the literature on leadership focuses on being confident, being confident enables us show others that we know where we are going and that they should follow us there, in essence gaining their buy- in.

However getting buy-in or truly winning people over starts with knowing what you care about, and then being able to express that in ways others can relate to, which can be termed as being “authentic”, being authentic articulates and identifies what you stand for and where you’re trying to take yourself and the world.

Becoming a more authentic leader means being yourself wherever you are, when we are authentic we are congruent with what we are trying to do in our community, our lives and our work, in other words “we talk the talk and walk the walk”.

When we are authentic our values shine through, and it is these values that make or break “ being a leader and being a follower. When we are authentic others will naturally follow along enthusiastically.

The Being Authentic and Confident Programme is designed to support you to be a more Authentic and Confident Person. You will learn how to be true to yourself and project your strength. Your confidence is your ability to act on your inner authority, your true self. You will learn 5 Ways to gain authentic confidence and you will go through a six-step process to build your authenticity and confidence in 12 areas of your life.

Are You Ready?

  • To transform and confront your fears?
  • To express yourself fully and with confidence?
  • To deal with conflicts directly and resolve them effectively?
  • To take risks and go for what you truly want?
  • To have more freedom, peace and confidence in your relationship, your work and your life?
  • To elevate your business above the competition?

Why attend this workshop?

This workshop is focused on you waking up to your full potential and a level of conscious awareness of who you are. It is about you connecting deep within you and learning to trust your inner wisdom.

What if you could stay in a heightened state of conscious awareness, a state of peak experience and a heightened state of appreciation and personal authenticity on a regular basis?

During the workshop you will get in touch with what robs you of your authenticity: environmental and familial, social and cultural, personal and psychological influence, thoughts and fears.

You will learn the benefits and rewards of being authentic and confident.

For you to become more real and authentic in your life it is important that you take full responsibility for how you internalise the external messages – You will be taken through a seven-step process that that clears you of your myths and limiting beliefs and open your greater mind to the possibilities from the quantum field of open potential.

7 Steps To Becoming A Great Leader

In this blog introduction to 7 Steps to being a great leader, We present a short introduction to:

  • Clarity
  • Communication
  • Courage
  • Connected
  • Creative
  • Calm
  • Committed


Great leaders have clarity. Clarity of vision, mission, purpose, plans and goals – centred on achieving value for the customers and clients.


Great leaders are exceptional communicators because the are fully aware that communication is the real business of leaders. Think about all the great communicators who you know:

  • Do they inspire people?
  • Do they create connections with insights and emotional intelligence?

Do they speak directly to people’s needs?

Click Here for Leadership At Another Level


Courage to do what is right, courage to go against the crowd, courage to take different approach when needed, courage to stand alone, if and when your conscience tells you to do so. Courage to be innovative, to live your truth, speak your truth, courage to act on your truth and lead with integrity. People will wait to see if you are courageous as a leader before they’re willing to follow your lead. 
Connected – As a connected leader you strive to learn more and be more consistent in finding even more ways to deliver value and you are committed to the preparation required for serving people and your business in the most effective manner. As a connected leader you understand the value of networks. 
As a connected leader you strive to develop a connected workplace and that 
 requires collaboration as well as co-operation. Both collaborative behaviours (working together for a common goal) and cooperative behaviours (sharing freely without any quid pro quo) are needed.

Trust only emerges when knowledge is shared and diverse points of views are accepted. Connected leaders know how to foster deeper connections that can be developed through meaningful conversations. As a connected leader you know and understand the importance of tacit knowledge in solving complex problems.


Businesses now more than ever need to find creative solutions to the challenges brought about by disruption in the forms of new technology, merging business models, and soaring customer expectations. Leading creative disruption is about breaking existing patterns of behaviour and the status quo within a culture. Disruption signals departure from the norm and from mediocrity.

Creative disruption is also about instituting challenge (disruption) within your business to break old corporate habits; by signaling and leading this disruption your leadership require the business to adapt and improve its business model so that it can better succeed. Every business continues to adjust to disruptions, as competitors respond to a business’ unique offering.


Calm, centred and clear thinking under Pressure – The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success, his influence, his power for good.

Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom – James Allen

Level-headed and maintenance of composure in a crisis

Times of crisis are unavoidable in the current business world which is fraught with uncertainties-. It is your role as a leader to steady the ship amidst the storm; panic in such times only adds fuel to the fire especially when others will turn to you to restore calm. Great leaders are exceptional problem identifiers. Great leaders are better problem-solvers. One trait that separates great leaders from

the field of problem-solving is the ability to delve into a problem. Great leaders have the ability to ask the right questions, and understand the root cause of an issue. Although this might not be easy, great leaders, however, not only intuitively understand how to delve into a problem but they also know how to construct and assess the problem in terms of a solution.


A committed leader knows the difference between the talk and the walk. A committed leader knows that leadership exists at all levels. Committed leaders understand the distinctions of commitment in various forms; such as commitments:

  • To the self – how much you work on developing yourself as a human being, to be the best leader you can be. In fact, it is self-awareness that is the first major step toward becoming truly committed. Self-awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence, a skill that 90% of top performing leaders possess in abundance. Great leaders’ high self-awareness means they have a clear and accurate image not just of their leadership style, but also of their own strengths and weaknesses. They know where they shine and where they’re weak, and they have effective strategies for compensating for those weaknesses.
  • To people – how much you really focus on connecting with those around you in order to work effectively with them.
  • To the business – how much you are devoted to the intentions and performance of the place where you work so that you show up with maximum energy and conviction.
  • To the truth – how much you tell and invite the truth, even when it is hard, in order to keep yourself, others and the organisation on a right course.
  • To leadership – how much you answer a call to lead and choose to engage in proven, effective leadership habits and behaviours.

Examples of commitment to:
Self: “Know thyself,” said Socrates to the ancient Greeks and his advice is every bit as important today as it was thousands of years ago. To be a great leader you need to firstly, learn about yourself and with this knowledge, secondly, commitment follows. One effective way of learning about you is to invite feedback. Blind spots, oversights and faulty assumptions can all be surfaced from effective feedback.

People: People want to be appreciated. When people see that you are only focusing on a task, output or goal, they can feel as though they are no more respected than machines in a factory. People want to know their contribution is valued; no one ever thanks a machine.

The committed leader responds by doing more than just saying thank you. One way is to build followers’ capacity by helping them develop skills to further their importance to the business along with their careers. Another means is for you as a leader is to always recognise your people’s willingness to help and acknowledge their role in making a difference. Recognition can be a huge motivator and people may work harder for recognition rather than money.

Great leaders demonstrate empathy with people. This is the capacity to see things as others see them, and is a key skill needed to influence others. Leaders unsympathetic to a people-centric commitment are empowered by to develop their Emotional Intelligence. IT IS RECOGNISED IN PSYCHOLOGY that there may be nothing more essential than recognising our deepest feeling about what we do and what changes might make us more truly satisfied with our work.

Committed leaders have no problem letting go of the notion that the only function of people is to get in line and do their jobs. A display of empathy is a welcome outreach to those looking for signs that a leader respects their work.

Commitment in Business: The basis of this commitment is your business mission statement – its reason for existing – and your willingness as a leader to sacrifice

personal interests or agendas to support it. A committed leader finds meaning, value and purpose in the business and then shares that commitment with everyone else. One way is to align the corporate mission statement with a personal one that covers what the leader is passionate about, why leading the business, the vision of accomplishment for the business and how this commitment gives power, meaning and fulfillment. Anything less than a total commitment here is likely to be picked up by sensitive staff, which could easily lessen your leadership effectiveness.

Truth: Jim Collins in his book Good to Great says “Confront the brutal facts, but never lose faith.” This is perhaps the most difficult of all the commitments because it requires up-front honesty. Any attempt to sanitize reality regardless of the situation through spin or less than forthright assessments could permanently damage your leadership credibility and erode any possibility of trust. Anything less than the truth from your leadership is unsustainable.

Contact: to join webinar on 7 Steps To Being A Great Leader


7 Steps to Being  A Great Leader

Join on 8 February 2016 for 7 Consecutive weeks and learn the 7 Steps to being an even more Great Leader


7 Steps To Being A Great Leader

Being Your Best

This post opens up possibilities by focusing on 12 Tips To Enable You – Being Your Best each day.

  1. Feed your brain with something positive each day, the right nutrients that will sustain you to be your best. So choose wisely the food that you eat. Feed yourself with the right literature to enable you being your best. Monitor your thoughts, your thoughts today will create what you have tomorrow and subsequent future. Your thoughts create resonance and what ever you are resonating you will draw to you. Focus deeply on your most important project. It is a cosmic law that what you focus on will expand and your energy will go to what you are giving attention.
  1. Remind Yourself Each Day Of Your Purpose. You will find that you achieve more in life when your top three goals each day are connected to your purpose. ( offer workshop on Finding Your Passion and Purpose)
  1. First, focus on your most important issue; it is easy to get distracted by the agendas of other people, emails, a number of issues and outside demands that are crowding for your energy and time. Make your first task the task of prioritising your top five goals for the day.
  1. Say No to tasks that are not among your priorities. Give your full and complete attention to what you are currently focused on. It means turning off your smart telephone when you are in meetings and when you are having downtime. It means focusing on the meeting you are in, so that you can concentrate and give better input as well as conserving your decision making energy.
  1. Invest in carving out quality time and protect that time. Quality time is time when you are able to focus and think deeply on what is important to you and what you want to achieve. Build in time to connect. This is connecting to anything – whether it be people, animals, nature or the wider world. As a human being you do have an innate need to connect with people. Be aware that ignoring your social life will probably impact your health and well-being as well as your mental performance. Invest in playtime, this is about time with friends, going to see a movie, going to the theatre, watching comedy or playing with a child – it is all about novelty connections and fun. You have similar need for play as an adult to a child. Among the reasons why you play are the need to: learn, create, focus, compete, be challenged, be co-operative, experience pleasure, fun and joy
  1. Remember to exercise each day, even walking for 10 minutes each day will give you added benefits – when you exercise you generate more oxygen to your brain and you flush out the toxins and improve the coherence between the left and right sides of your brain. Your Mental Performance Improves With Exercise
  1. Get to know yourself, know your peak times. Be aware that your energy wanes as your sugar level drops. Work with your flow and get things done in your peak times.
  1. Avoid multi-tasking. Your brain is much more efficient when you are focused on one single thing at a time, be aware that multi-tasking can lead to decreased performance. When you have two or more things to do, focus on the most important first, and then sequence your next task until you are complete.
  1. Decide what you want to get out of each meeting prior to attending the meting. What is your focus for the meeting? Will you be focused on: Vision? Planning – Detail? Delivery? Evaluation? Or Drama? You will achieve more by focusing on an inspiring vision of the future. Be conscious of where you need to be at the end of each meeting and be aware of the most effective way to get to your next appointment. Know that conversations will tend to expand to fill the time available, so stay focused on your outcomes for the day.
  1. Being your best means consistently paying attention to your attitude and your state of mind. Learn to maintain a positive state of mind because 90% of your success is related to your mind-set. This is exemplified in the work of Stanford University Psychologist Carol Dweck  – Mindset: The New Psychology of Success – Carol presents an enquiry into the power of your beliefs – conscious and unconscious – and how even the simplest change in your belief can have a profound effect on your life. Your brain will automatically move you away from pain and towards pleasure, so the perspective you bring to bear on how you view an issue is important. Change your perspective and you will change your outcome.
  1. It is important to allow yourself to rest so do carve out downtime. When you create downtime, you find that you get a lot more insight into your mind. Downtime is anything that is non-goal-focused. Maybe your down time is your leisure time, reading a novel, meditation, listening to music or what ever is of interest to you. This allows your brain the important time it needs to recover as well as allowing space for your sub-conscious connections to come to the surface to solve complex problems.
  1. Celebrate small wins. Celebrating your wins matters because wins contribute to boosting happiness and the more happy you are, the more productive you will be – a University of Warwick study confirms that happy people are about about 12 percent more productive  so breakdown you large goals each day into smaller goals and celebrate your wins. Being Your Best is about being successful in whatever way you define success and consistently moving forward to more complete achievement of your goals and your happiness.
  • Leading Your Life Powerfully: Passion and Purpose Workshop – 26 January 2016

  • Venue London
  • Join the membership of at Master Level and receive the workshop as a bonus – Your Investment for the Workshop £333.33
  • Master level gives you access to privileges with and access to forthcoming Top World Leaders

A Life Changing Event for You, A Committed Leader

This is a call to action for a life changing event for you, a committed leader

  • Are you interested in expanding and developing your leadership?
  • Do you want to share with a group of highly conscious people are committed making a difference in the world?
  • Would you like to be the kind of leader who source, generate and prioritize creative projects?
  • How passionate are you about bringing in new consciousness to create a world that works better for everyone?
  • Do you want your leadership to leave a legacy?

Are you ready for: Your life changing event for you, a committed leader? 

Listen To The Stories

I invite you as a VIP TO CANCUN, MEXICO.

From the 1 – 16 DECEMBER 2015


staying at the

The Ritz-Carlton, Cancun

Retorno del Rey No. 36, Zona Hotelera

Cancun, Mexico 77500

The Ritz-Carlton, Cancun has been recognised with the AAA Five Diamond Award for over 10 consecutive years extending along the powdery white sand and pristine turquoise waters of Cancun’s world renowned beach is considered Cancun’s premium property and just 20 minutes from Cancun International Airport.

JOIN Teachers, Mentors, Coaches, Business Partners, Academics, Graduates and Friends, Future Leaders, LIVE for a truly extraordinary VIP Individual Passage into a Bright Shared Future by enrolling and registering with us with us to attend:

“The Being A Leader And The Effective Exercise Of Leadership Enquiry”


Multiple Leadership Development Days and Experiential Activities

The trip and ontological enquiry (ontology: How you are being) gives you access as your natural self-expression to the ways of being, creative imagination, thinking, planning, and action required to be a leader and to exercise leadership effectively. The programme is specifically designed to provide you with the tools and distinctions that are required to achieve significant breakthroughs in their professional and personal life – in any environment, and no matter what the circumstances.



@ 5:55 PM on Sundays UK DIAL ☎ in

U.K +44-330-606-0182

Local Numbers available also

use your Access Code 950612# listen for confirmation, then press 1 to confirm


Text to +44 7738 762044 for details of additional benefits of the programme, reference Neslyn Watson-Druée.

Neslyn DIRECT Cell Phone (+447768000321)


111 Global Leadership Academies – The Leadership of Hope

Passionate leaders are the purveyors of hope; when we review the archives of history, we see that among the forceful distinctions of leadership, is a leader’s ability to generate hope.

So how does consider the distinction of hope?

In establishing 111 Global Leadership Academies, under the umbrella of LeaderShapeNow, consider hope to be a human factor that is dynamic, powerful social capital sustaining innovation and creativity.

Why is hope a key distinction within the creation of a new kind of leadership?

Leadership and hope are universal to human beings, leaders have always used hope to influence their behaviours and actions to make a difference in every aspect of human endeavour.

Leaders are agents of change, they epitomise a cause in the action; leaders within the role of change agents affect other people more than other people affect them. Within 111 Global Leadership Academies there lies The Future of Leadership, where a new kind of leadership is emerging. A leadership that calls for a new order, new vision for human potential, new priorities, new perspectives, application of new technologies that work for people, to release creativity and harness human potential.

111 Global Leadership Academies exists to enhance peoples’ creativity and to emphasise the strength that people exhibit rather than the symptoms of psychological pathologies. 111 Global Leadership Academies are here to give a hand up with peoples’ projects, plans and resources rather than giving a hand out.

The ultimate goal of 111 Global Leadership Academies is to understand and build the factors that allow individuals, communities and societies to flourish.

The empowering context of 111 Global Leadership Academies is to create an activating force that enables people, even when faced with the most overwhelming obstacles, to envision a promising future, to set, pursue and get goals that lead to wise choices to be healthy, wise and free. This is what 111 Global Leadership Academies believe to be the leadership of hope.

Within the empowering context of 111 Global Leadership Academies hope is comprised of emotion, thinking and feeling as well as a desire for a better future and future that works for everyone. 111 Global Leadership Academies led by stand for leadership that opens up choices for each person to maximise his or her potential.

When you and everyone else on the planet get the joy of living your purpose and passion, then get the joy of living with purpose and passion. For as long exist, until you and everyone else on the planet get the understanding of a purpose driven life and the joy of living with purpose and passion, then the work of is not complete. The hope of 111 Global Leadership Academies as envision by a strong ambassador, Baroness Debbie Stedman-Scott, deputy leader in the House of Lords, UK Parliament; is a world that adds value to people’s lives and a world in which no young person is on benefit.

I invite you to join the movement of The Future of Leadership, a new kind of leadership that creates a vortex for hope through 111 Global Leadership Academies. A vortex in which optimism and hope are intertwined; optimism moves towards goals and valued results and – hope is focused on setting goals and getting goals in order to attain a positive outcome for the future; with equal weight to both optimism and hope.

The Future of Leadership, operationalised through 111 Global Leadership Academies and is a movement whose time has come. The values of 111 Global Leadership Academies are underpinned with:

  • High self-esteem – arising from successful pursuit of your valued goals and entrepreneurism.
  • Self-efficacy – that is activated when you are faced with situations that calls for your self-empowerment and a belief in your capacity to achieve your desired goals. The stronger your reason for the goal, in other words, the stronger your why? The stronger your self-efficacy.
  • Self-Awareness – an important competency of the emotionally intelligent person. Emotionally intelligent leaders are aware of their emotional experience and they know what they are feeling most of the time. They have the capacity to recognise how their feelings impact their personal opinions, attitudes and judgements. (Roche Martin Emotional Capital Report). When you have signature strengths in self-awareness you will find that you begin to build your awareness muscle and you begin to scan the environment: physical, social and economic with awareness.
  • Hope and goal getting – as a catalyst for entrepreneurism, future action and results. There are distinct differences in how you may approach goal getting depending on your hope orientation. If you have high hope you will pursue your goal with affective zest and in contrast if you have low hope you will demonstrate affective lethargy in pursuit of your goals. In addition, high hope people not only energetically pursue their goals, they also generate more goals and are able to use feedback to generate successful goal attainment strategies. is leading the establishment of 111 Global Leadership Academies. The first academies will be established in mega cities where there are more than 10 million people in those cities, followed by others.

The first academy was launched on 1 May in Milan

Join the movement of The Future of Leadership by becoming a member with the membership model of Should you wish to lead or supervise the leadership of one or more of the 111 Global Leadership Academies, then please send an email to and you will have a integrity interview with Neslyn and her Partners.

Link Video click here

Star Performing Leaders

Star Performing Leaders

It is highly recognised that emotional intelligence skills are central to successful leadership.

Emotional skills are sometimes brushed aside as soft skills. Soft skills are sometimes broken down into personal attributes, such as: optimism, common sense, responsibility, a sense of humour, integrity, time-management and motivation.

In addition, interpersonal abilities, such as: empathy, communication the ability to teach, good manner and sociability may also be included.

I firmly believe that as a leader and entrepreneur it is essential that you have the capacity to release the creativity, vision, passion and workability of your people.

Your relationship skills and your capacity to engage  empathetically with others is crucial in order to enhance and capitalise  your workforce’s innovation, efficiency and effectiveness.

What differentiates star performing leaders from the rest?

Consciously developing relationships is the most valuable asset a star performing leader can cultivate because relationships represent a unique strategic resource.

“The fundamental glue that holds any relationship together is trust.” – Brian Tracy

“No single factor predicts the productivity of an employee more clearly than his or her relationship with a direct supervisor.” –  Gallup Organisation

On reviewing my high performance coaching practice I have analysed that 85% of the time I spend with my clients, as a certified high performance coach, is spent on enabling leaders to improve their performance issues and challenges with others within the workforce.

Professor Martyn Newman, Sheffield Business School and Author of RocheMartin Emotional Capitalist Report states: Building relationship capital requires understanding and identifying the key relationships in your business and using practical strategies for leveraging them to improve the business. Good relationships with a wide range of people are necessary, and specific skills are involved to improve social effectiveness.

The first involves becoming aware of the work and social environment, it teaches you when, where and why to begin and end a variety of interactions.

The second part, interpersonal skills enhancement, covers verbal and non-verbal aspects of personal interactions – how to be a good listener, how to switch topics etc. and the third part centres on presentation skills.

Here are some of the reasons why I believe relationship skills is vital to star performing leaders:

  • Every relationship that your business has with everyone offers the potential for people to be touched, moved and inspired by you so hence, relationship skills is an asset and an investment.
  • Understanding the powerful role of emotions in the workplace separate the star performing leaders apart from the average.
  • I believe that one of the fundamental task of a star performing leader is to facilitate good feelings in the people being lead,  and that at the heart of leadership, the pulse is emotional. I believe that the root of emotional intelligence anchors what a leader does well. This emotional element is sometimes invisible and often ignored.
  • My experience as a board member for 25 years inclusive 10 years as Chairman of an NHS Commissioning Trust has taught me that relationships represent a unique strategic resource. Also, my study of psychology reminds me one of the oldest laws in psychology, which states that beyond a moderate level, increases in anxiety and worry erode mental abilities.

If people’s emotions are pushed toward the range of enthusiasm performance can leap; if people are pushed towards acrimony and anxiety, performance will fall. When leaders drive emotions positively, they bring out the best in everyone – Daniel Goleman

  •  Although emotions and moods may seem trivial from a business point of view, they have real consequences for getting work done. A study at Yale University on mood and performance, demonstrates that negative emotions: especially chronic anxiety, or a sense of futility, powerfully disrupt work and hijack attention form the task in hand.
  •  Reference to The Open Loop and other breakthroughs in brain research support the notion that leaders’ moods and actions have enormous impact on the people they lead – the key task of emotionally intelligent leaders is to inspire, keep people motivated and committed as well as to arouse passion and enthusiasm.
  •  There are sound business reasons why relationship skills make good business sense. Relationship skills add real commercial value to the balance sheet and this value can be measured in any successful business.
  •  Over 80% of job terminations are due to poor relationship skills not poor technical skills.
  • Most of us spend over 95% of our lives interacting with others.
  • Poor relationship between strategic leaders, entrepreneurs, line managers and staff can damage the financial bottom line of a business because poor relationships affect performance and strategic outcomes.
  • Creating effective relationships with those you need to get you where you want to be makes good personal, interpersonal and corporate sense.

In the context of emotional intelligence the development of competence in relationship skills is important because a good understanding of the impact of effective relationships helps you to:

  • Manage conflict with skill
  • Build effective relationships and be effective with people at all levels
  • Develop inter and intra personal intelligence within relationships
  • Focus on effective team relationships and measurable outcomes
  • Be effective with diverse groups of people and cultures
  • Increase your understanding and acceptance of others
  • Be effective in your personal relationships and preserve that which you value within the relationship.

Click here to read the forward to her book: The Beacon Leadership Technique – 6 Conscious Blueprints to Experience Your Joy

Click here to purchase the book

Neslyn is The Renowned International Speaker on Relationship Skills